Is your sister or brother getting on your last nerve?
It’s not unusual to have arguments with your sibling. Whether you’re looking for ways to have a better relationship with your sister or feel overshadowed by your brother, we’re here to help.
“I’m so sick of my sister copying my style! She’s had her hair cut exactly like mine and now she’s started wearing the same clothes. It’s driving me crazy – why can’t she find her own look?!”
It can be frustrating to have someone copy your style and it may even feel as if they’re trying to ‘steal’ your identity. Remind yourself of the saying: “Imitation is a form of flattery”. Your sister is copying you because she admires you, and that’s something pretty special. She wants to be as cool as you! However, having a mini me you didn’t order can still be incredibly irritating. Try to encourage your sister to find their own style and help them experiment with fashion – you can offer to go through their wardrobe together to help them put together outfits that don’t exactly mirror yours. A nudge in the right direction might be all that’s needed.
Get more advice on how to deal with copycats here.
“My brother is definitely the ‘favourite child’. He’s really good at football and all my mum and dad seem to care about is his tournaments, how many goals he scored and how he’s going to be a star striker one day. I feel like they don’t care about me as much and it sucks. I feel so jealous.”
It’s not a nice feeling to have but rest assured that sibling jealousy is quite normal and there are ways to address it. Siblings often compete for attention from their parents which can lead to one feeling more overshadowed or less loved than the other. It can help to talk about how you’re feeling with your parents. Find a time when you can speak to them alone and ask if you can have a chat. Try to pick a moment when they’re not too busy or stressed.
It’s also worth keeping in mind that your sibling probably has some feelings of jealousy towards you, too. After all, you will have your own unique qualities that they perhaps feel they cannot measure up to. When you recognise this, it helps you gain perspective and hopefully feel less bitter.
Find out more about dealing with feelings of jealousy here.
“My brother keeps bossing me around and taking my stuff. If I try to stick up for myself, he punches and kicks me. He’s a lot bigger than I am and I feel scared of him. I get so angry and upset when he picks on me.”
It might sound silly to think of your brother as your bully but this IS a form of bullying and it’s not OK. Nobody has the right to hurt or intimidate you – especially not in your own home, the one place where you’re supposed to feel completely safe from harm. That’s why it’s really important to tell a parent or caregiver about what’s happening to you.
It may also help to talk directly to your brother and tell him how his actions are making you feel. He might be surprised to hear how upsetting you find their behaviour, especially if he’s always considered their actions to just be light-hearted banter or play fighting. Sometimes, people need to be clearly shown the error of their ways to change their negative behaviours. To get more help with this issue, click here.